Angry Donut.

Schrödinger doesn't like to listen, and she really doesn't like to sit still. Almost every time we try to make her sit down with us she just wiggles around and fights us, no matter how hard she is purring or secretly wants us to pet her, she fights as hard as she can to jump off the couch. She then proceeds to sit literally a foot away and actually sigh, and then look at us, all partially angry. 

She also acts like she is entitled to any and all snacks we are trying to eat. She goes to the end of the hallway and zooms as fast as she can going, "BRRRRRRRT" and runs through your legs. She grabs your feet, and stands up and makes her cutest out-of-the-side-of-her-mouth meow. Then, when you inevitably don't give her the food, she does the same sigh she always does and stares at you, all partially angry. 

This is where the anger builds up, while she's staring. Usually she'll let out another "BRRRRT" and pin her one ear back, and look all mad, like she needs to find something to bite right now. 

She then zooms away, to her cat bed, which is shaped like a donut, so we call it her donut. She body slams it, and kicks and bites and flips it all around, and drags herself around it in a circle. 

Luckily she murders her donut instead of us. She's predictable too, every time she gets angry, she sighs out loud, makes a "BRRRRT" noise, and jumps on the donut. 

Critter Carols

EDIT: This was adorable but it keeps scaring both me and other people!

A holiday card from us at Lightning Paradox.

Us being me, Dinger, and our dinosaur friend. :D

Bar tricks and other talents.

Almost everyone I know seems to have some kind of awesome trick that they can do. One of those ones that isn't actually cool or useful enough to do anything but entertain people when you're drinking or blow little kid's and stoner's minds. Or freak the shit out of your girlfriend. My boyfriend can do this weird gross thing with his pinky finger and can pop his shoulders out of socket. I've met people who could tie knots in cherry stems, open beer in tricky ways, do back-flips, simple magic tricks, are just excellent at shooting pong/quarters/basketballs from crazy angles. I've never really been able to do any of that.

Until tonight.

I have discovered that I can light a lighter with my toes. Yeah, I know, you wish you were this spectacular.

Anyway, this is my last week of class and I have finals next week, so sometime after that I'll do a real post. :D

Dinger has a twin.

And he's sweeping the internet. I think Schrödinger is the evil one though.

She does do stuff like this all the time, though.

Snow Ninja Ultimate Showdown Party Time Adventure.

Last night I fell asleep at around 3AM. After a day of empty threats from the weather lady about lake effect snow warnings and nothing but a few flakes that quickly melted, I felt a false sense of security.
This morning, having fallen asleep around 3AM, I snoozed the alarm clock until the last possible minute to wake up and still manage to do everything I need to do in the morning and get to class on time. Little did I know that behind my blackout curtain lurked 8-9" of terrible snow, completely covering my boyfriend's little Toyota Camry. This snow ninja had managed to come almost all at once within a 3 hour period. Nobody was prepared and nothing was salted, sanded, or plowed. Nothing was even thinking of being salted, sanded, or plowed for another few hours, when everyone got the memo that OMGITFUCKINGSNOWEDASHITTON.
Back to the original plot. I volunteered to go shovel out and brush off the car, because my boyfriend needed a shower. I bundled up in all of my warmest gear, which somehow I managed to get together early this year. I headed outside with a shovel I found in the basement, and spent a good 20 minutes managing to throw at least 4 shovel-fulls of snow back onto myself because I am snow-shovel impaired and somehow don't know how to do it right.
Meanwhile the snow ninja was raining down in all it's fury almost as fast as I could brush it off the car. As soon as I got back in the house I felt like I was never going to be dry or warm again and like I'd run a marathon. Tricky snow ninja, knowing I'm all out of shape and coming so close after Thanksgiving. Little does it know that there was an electric snow shovel lurking in the basement with the regular shovel, and the only delay in that cavalry is the lack of a nice outdoor extension chord. Your day will come snow ninja.

And since I'm too lazy to draw anything right now here's what part of my campus looked like around 9AM.

PS this is a main road on campus. 

Invisible Forcefield!

Glass table+cat treats=INVISIBLE FORCEFIELD.

The creepy eye.

Because of Dinger's ear accident, she's got some facial nerve damage. Some of it is incredibly adorable, like when she meows it only comes out of one side of her mouth.

Some of it is just badass. She sleeps with one eye open. Just another reason why she's a ninja assassin. 

Which leads me to the creepy eye. Cats have that weird veiny eyelid under their normal eyelids, and that creepy thing is what she blinks the eye she can't close with. If it wasn't scary enough, that eyelid blinks sideways. She'll be sitting there all adorable and suddenly the creepy eyelid is all blinking sideways like some kind of horrible lizard monster eye. 

It freaks me out every time, even though you'd think I'd be used to it. BUT, that isn't the creepiest thing about the creepy eye. When she yawns, it does the same terrible lizard sideways blink, but with one half of her mouth kind of RAWRing. It makes her look like a straight up demon. I'll spare you the horror and won't draw it. 

A bit of an introduction.

Hello all, my name is Autumn. Yes, like the season. I'll start by saying my name makes no sense, because my birthday is actually in July. My parents had decided on a name long before I decided to make my grand entrance into the world a good two months earlier than planned, my due date having been the first day of fall.
Now for a little bit more about my bad self. I'm 20, I'm in college, I'm going for my BA in Biology and I have my own apartment with my boyfriend of 4.5 years, Spencer. This is us. :D

As you can see we're quite the cute couple. He's also a Biology major, we've known each other since middle school, have been dating since high school, and are just flat out weird together. We've been on many an adventure, and I'm sure many an adventure will pop up here, once I get the ball rolling on this bitch.
We have a cat. She has one ear, and her name is Schrödinger. Yes, Schrödinger. If you get it, give yourself a pat on the back because while we both thought it was a fun, relatively nerdy name to give our kitten, literally 2 people have gotten it. Here she is, in all her glory.

  Everyone always wonders what happened to her ear, and her favorite explanation is a gang fight against ninjas while she was on an assassination mission. She's a ninja-assassin, just in case you didn't guess.
But really, before she came to us she was a barn cat, meaning her mother was feral and she lived on a farm and her job was to hunt rodents and other pests that may get into the barn. One night she climbed up inside a car, probably because it was warm, and in the morning when her previous owner turned the car on, she saw Dinger run away, and the next thing you know she only had one ear.
It's not creepy or anything, it's actually kind of cute, and we adopted her because her old owner couldn't keep her in the house due to allergies and she probably wouldn't have survived a winter with only one ear.

Together we make a small family of weirdos, and we're all just the right amount of strange for each other.
Oh, and the name for this little blog comes from my usual online username, Blitz or Blitzkrieg, and Schrödinger's cat paradox. Nothing all that creative, but I thought it sounded cool.